pop culture, tv

Bachelor in Paradise Week 5

BBs, this week starts on the day of the Rose Ceremony. At this point, 5 girls are leaving. Quite a few people are talking about the whole Brendan & Pieper fiasco and how they are taking up 2 spots that should go to deserving people. A group, led by Joe, goes to confront Brendan and Pieper. Brendan gets super defensive, while Pie barely says a word. They then storm off to talk by themselves. They decide to leave! Yay!!! Pieper does NOT look happy and doesn’t say a word in the car. Guess they had to pay the piper!!! HA!!!

Maurissa sets up a little vignette for Riley with whipped cream, chocolate sauce, and strawberries. They have to pick body parts out of a bowl and lick whipped cream off said body part. Maurissa must REALLY like Riley because she licks whipped cream off HIS TOES!!!! VOMIT!!!! It’s the grossest thing I’ve ever witnessed! Then they head off to the Boom Boom Room.

Today is Tammy’s birthday! She tells Thomas he’s her best friend and she will fight for him. Thomas says he has feelings for Becca and that there’s nothing Tammy can say to change his mind. Well, Happy Birthday Tam! Tammy walks off sobbing, Thomas goes and makes out with Becca.

Rose Ceremony

Wells comes to the ceremony and gives Natasha a rose because she deserves to stay after Brendan played her. Yay!!!! Now just 4 ladies are going home.

Riley gives his rose to Maurissa

Joe to Serena

Ivan to Kendall (who knew they were even talking???)

Noah to Abigail

Kenny to Mari

James to Tia (where did that come from???)

Thomas to Becca

Aaron to Chelsea (what?!!?)

Going home: Deandra, Tammy, Jessenia, and Demi (who’s super upset).

Lil Jon comes on as this week’s host. Now the ladies have the roses.

Next Day

Blake (who??) arrives with a date card. He chats up the ladies and takes Tia on the date. Poor James is v bummed. Tia and Blake go riding in a 4 wheeler type thing, then have a picnic and an outdoor shower (which is odd) and make out. They really hit it off. Tia is calling him Tatty Daddy because of his tattoos. She says he makes her vagina dance. Wow.

Meanwhile, things are heating up with Kenny and Mari. They go to the Boom Boom Room. I hope this room gets a thorough cleaning on the daily!!!

Next Day

Dr Joe arrives with a date card. He chats with Natasha and they get along great! He asks her on his date and they go to Fake Dinner and drink HUGE margaritas and everything is going so well!!! EVERYONE on the beach is rooting for Natasha to find love!!! Everything is going great with Dr Joe until he asks why is Nat still single and she has to tell him about Brendan. WHO, btw, is one of Dr Joe’s best friends. The entire vibe changes and Dr Joe puts the brakes on fast!!!

Kendall and Ivan are hanging out but she’s still hung up on regular Joe. Joe and Serena tell each other they are falling in love with each other. SO cute!!! Meanwhile Kendall is a HOT mess!!!

And that’s it until next week BBs!!! xo 🌹

pop culture, tv

Bachelor in Paradise Week 4 Parts 1 & 2

BBs, y’all better sit down, because this is gonna get juicy!!! Also, I couldn’t watch part 1 yesterday so this is a Part 1 & 2 combo deal for you!

Part 1

Kendall makes a beeline to Joe and they go off and talk, and argue, and talk some more. Kendall says she needs closure, but also that she still loves Joe and misses him. Joe then brings Serena up to speed and says he’s over Kendall and wants to pursue Serena.

Noah and Abigail patch things up.

Kenny and Tia come back from their date and Mari grabs Kenny right away. WHY is this 40 year old dude such a hot commodity??? I do not get it. Mari tells Kenny she still has feelings for him. Kenny says can we talk tomorrow? Demi is fuming the whole time. Then Kenny and Demi chat and Demi pulls a desperate move and asks him to go to the Boom Boom Room. He turns her down. Whew. Demi is pissed but girl, you’re better than that!

Next Day

Natasha and Brendan are getting along really well and she’s really into their relationship. Then….Pieper arrives. UGH I Hate spelling her name. Her parents should be flogged!!! WHY the extra E I ask you??? Anyway, Pieper has a date card. She doesn’t chat up the boys or even look at anyone but Brendan. Pieper asks Brendan to go and he can’t say yes fast enough. Now, remember a couple weeks ago the rumor was that Brendan and Pie were dating in real life before Paradise. Well, I’d say this cements that theory!!!

Brendan goes through the motions of pulling Natasha to make sure she’s ok with him going off with Pie. He says he wants to explore relationships with both ladies. Natasha is understandably upset.

Brendan and Pieper go to Fake Dinner and Brendan’s wearing a mock turtleneck. WHAT is it with the winter wear in Mexico in Summer Brendan??? SO odd. And, your boy is sitting there sweating buckets! Try a crew neck, pardner! Brendan says he and Pie are super casual, but Pie seems to think otherwise and says they are dating. Then Brendan says he navigated it so he’d be in Paradise when Pie arrived. Pieper says Brendan is my boyfriend. SUS!!!! So basically Brendan admits to playing Natasha for weeks just for her roses. Scum!!!

Next Day

Everyone at the resort is all abuzz talking about Brendan and Pieper and poor Natasha. Natasha pulls Pieper to talk and realizes that Brendan’s been lying the whole time about the seriousness of his relationship with Pie. Then Nat & Brendan talk and Brendan has the NERVE to say “What other options did you have that I kept you from?” I mean!!! What’s the point of all this B&P??? TV time? A free trip to Mexico?? UGH. Next thing you know, the camera cuts to B&P and they are seriously talking about their Insta followers and being is US Weekly! Sidebar: I was actually following Pie but NO MORE SIS!!!!

Part 2

Demi is working HARD to keep Kenny’s attention. Hard. Meanwhile, Titus Burgess (from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt) arrives to be the guest host. I LOVED him on Kimmy but he falls flat here IMO. He announces there’s a VIP party tonight but only some of the group can go. Becca, Aaron, Noah (with his 32 Claire’s Boutique necklaces), Abigail, Kenny, Jessenia, Chris, Riley, Deandra, James, Thomas, and Demi are invited.

VIP Party

All the girls left behind are all up in their own heads about what could be happening at the party. Some are even crying! At the party, Titus arrives and says he has VIPs coming who may join the house. 4 women come in: Chelsea , Alana (who??), Alaya (sp?) (also, WHO???), and McKenna. They mingle with the people but Chris immediately grabs Alana and they go out in the breezeway and make out! Jessenia goes looking for Chris and sees the whole scene. Then Chris and Alana go back to the dance floor and full on make out right in front of Jessenia some more. Jessenia (who left Ivan for Chris) gets upset and leaves the party.

Next Day

Mari sits Kenny down and says she’s all in. Kenny says he has strong feelings for Mari. He then relays this info to Demi who is so upset because she had sex with Kenny.

Jessenia is crushed by the events of the prior night and Chris is moping around the resort like he feels bad about how he treated Jessenia. Alana arrives with a date card and of course asks Chris. Chris tries to talk to Jessenia but she sends him away. Way to go Jess! Chris and Alana go zip lining and then try awkwardly to make out on a sofa while dogs eat their fruit tray! Ha! Back at the resort everyone is on Team Jessenia and hates Chris now.

Chelsea arrives with a date card and takes Aaron. They go horseback riding, have a picnic and make out. Becca (who had been flirting with Aaron) then gets a date card. Becca asks Tammy if it’s ok if she takes Thomas. Tammy says yes then goes off crying when it happens. Becca and Thomas go to Fake Dinner then make out.

Chris and Alana get back from their date. Joe, Riley, and Jessenia confront Chris and tell him he needs to leave because it’s obvious he and Alana had a connection prior to Paradise. Chris goes to talk to Alana and says he’s leaving. Alana decides to leave too. They leave but they don’t leave together. Bye!

Now, WHY OH WHY isn’t everyone putting Pieper and Brendan on blast like they did with Chris and Alana??? Curious.

Until next week BBs!!! xo 🌹