Bachelorette Week 7

Week 7. I swear ABC, this week had better be more substantial than last week’s debacle! So we’re in Riga, Latvia (I have no idea where that is. Gotta Google!). We start with Garrett’s 1-1. They meet up in the forest and walk towards a river. Then 2 naked people fall from the sky. The naked people tell them it’s a Latvian thing to bungee jump naked from a cable car over a river. In the snow. Not the ideal situation for the guy amirite??
So Alabama Hannah and Garrett strip down and get strapped to each other and jump out of the cable car. And props to them because you would not catch me doing that! But they keep talking about trusting each other before they jump and I’m like you better trust the guys who rigged up this contraption!!! After the jump there’s a shot of AH’s bra floating down the river! Ha!
That night at Fake Dinner AH shows up wearing this horrific pink fur (better be faux) jacket and sparkly pants. She’s so up and down with her fashion choices this season! They talk and he says he’s going to be all open and vulnerable and tell her about a major hardship and get your hankies ready because he had to….give up football because he hated it. WHAT??? THAT’S the hardest thing you’ve been through?? Ugh. Miss Red Nose gives Garrett the rose and that’s that.
Next up is the group date. Production has totally checked out because they just all walk around Riga market eating weird food and doing shots of moonshine! Meanwhile, Luke is STEWING over the whole naked bungee jumping thing. How dare AH do something fun and a little risque with another man?!?
That night AH redeems herself fashion wise and arrives in this hot, slinky, silver number slit up to there! She makes quit work of jumping on and straddling Tyler while they make out.
Later Luke confronts AH about the naked 1-1 with Garrett. He calls her decision “boneheaded” and I’m FUMING. WHY is he still here??? He’s a neanderthal!!!!
Tyler gets the rose.
Peter’s 1-1 is next and it’s about time he got a 1-1! He’s the sweetest, most positive guy there besides Mike. So AH & Peter go to some mud hut spa of sorts where a Latvian couple organize their date. First they get slapped with branches and the Latvian woman sings. Then they concoct a body scrub mixture they never use. The whole thing is odd. The Latvian couple lead AH & Peter to a sauna where they shake branches at them then leave AH & P to make out. Peter gets really handsy! Who knew he had such a naughty side?? They finish up the day date in a hot tub. That night at Fake Dinner Peter gets the rose.
Peter goes back to the hotel and is telling everyone about their date when Jed slips out to serenade AH. I am so tired of Jed (who seems like a nice guy) singing. He’s really milking this opportunity to showcase his mild talent! AH invites him in and he sings some more then they make out & Jed tells her he’s falling in love with her.
Back at the hotel Garrett & Luke are arguing again and someone please shoot me if they utter the phrase “stay in your lane” one more time. Dang!!! Luke just won’t shut up with his nonsense but Garrett gets the last word with “Sweet dreams Luke”. Ha!
The next day AH comes to the guys’ room and pulls Luke out to talk to him about his toxic behavior. Luke’s talking in circles again and spouting his BS “IF I said that”. YOU SAID IT!!! UGH!!!
Luke goes back to the hotel room and gets into it with all the guys. Chris Harrison appears and tells them there’s no cocktail party tonight and to get dressed for the rose ceremony. Everyone shoots daggers at Luke.
Rose Ceremony- Why are so many of the guys wearing high water pants and no socks?? Is this a trend?? Dylan and Dustin get sent home- casualties of the whole Luke problem. AH barely spoke a word to either of them! Luke gets the last rose and I want to throw something at the tv! WHY???
Chris Harrison feels my pain and asks AH WHY?? She says she’s either falling in love with Luke or he’s driving her crazy! HOW could you fall in love with such a jackass???
I. Can’t. I just can’t with her. Until next week my bbs. xo🌹

Bachelorette Week 6

Week 6- We start out back on Luke P’s 1-1 date where Alabama Hannah has just told him she can’t give him the rose. LP says “My bad, let’s move on” and I about spit out my drink! He is such a psychopath robot I just can’t get over it! LP says he respects AH’s decision but he sooo doesn’t and just keeps talking in circles. LEAVE YOU NUT JOB!!! Finally he walks out…but then he comes back!!! Is it just me or is a restraining order in AH’s future??
Cut to the rest of the guys wishing, hoping, and praying that LP never darkens their door again, when sure enough, LP’s steroid ridden crazy ass shows back up, sans rose. AH didn’t give him the rose but she’s letting him stay until at least the next rose ceremony.
The next day is the cocktail party and rose ceremony and AH shows up wearing a white dress with a slit up to THERE and one of Liberace’s cream jackets with shoulders so big and sharp they are dangerous! Doesn’t AH, or at least ABC’s stylist, know you don’t mix white and cream?? Anyway, Garrett grabs AH to talk first and he spends his time grilling her about her 1-1 with LP. Garrett, don’t you know that’s the quickest way to splitsville is talking about the other guys?? Ugh. I swear it’s like no one has seen the show! After their talk Garrett comes back to the group and calls out LP. All the other guys jump on LP’s case like starved hyenas on steak and it gets loud. AH hears all the commotion and walks in yelling “Stop!!!”. Then she takes a mini Q & A about LP. She finishes up by chastising all the guys and good for her. AH tells them they don’t know anything about her and seriously?? We’re in week 6 and the guys STILL aren’t taking their heads out of their asses long enough to get to know the actual forking Bachelorette?? Insane!!!
AH leaves the room and the guys start back up again like they didn’t just get chewed out. It’s like LP can’t help himself. He just will not shut up!!! He talks in circles and lies and lies. AH comes back again and declares that she doesn’t want to talk to anyone. LP is STILL talking.
AH leaves the room to cry in her champagne in the hallway and Chris Harrison shows up to comfort her. CH- It’s your party. AH- The party’s over. And I guess it is because all the sudden it’s time for the rose ceremony.
Rose Ceremony- AH give Luke the last rose and I vomit a little. Going home- Grant, Kevin, and Dylan? Devin? Who knows?!?
There’s no champagne toast and announcement of where they are going to next. Just a harsh scolding from AH and good on her for giving them the what for!
Next thing you know we’re in Latvia. The guys are all walking around the city of Riga while AH & CH are chatting in a cafe. AH is crying again and is just so frustrated and I can totally understand why. Sort of. I do NOT understand what she sees in LP and why she’s keeping him around. But she’s feeling really defeated by the whole process, I mean journey.
All the sudden we’re in LA watching a segment that was clearly filmed post production. AH & CH are sitting together in the mansion and WHAT??? They start reviewing the season!!! WHY? Does ABC think I’m so wine drunk I can’t remember what happened 5 ding dang minutes ago??? And that’s it! That’s the whole show! They spend the rest of the 2 hours re-running clips from the previous 5 episodes! UGH!!! Oooh, except, CH asks AH who’s the best kisser and she says Luke! Gag!!!
The rest of the season looks good and it looks like I called it when I predicted psycho Luke was the one who slut shames AH. Why am I not surprised?!?
Until next week my BBs!!! xo 🌹

Bachelorette Week 5

Week 5- We pick up with Alabama Hannah pulling both Lukes aside to get them to talk it out. Like that’s going to go well! Oh, Han, you poor naive thing!!! So they all sit down and the Lukes are just talking over each other and AH is sitting there with this glazed look on her face. It’s all maddening to watch. She finally gets up and leaves the room and the next thing you know Chris Harrison ends the cocktail party and calls everyone in for the rose ceremony. Because of all the Luke P/S drama, most of the guys don’t get to talk to AH so they are all up in arms.
Just as AH is about to hand out the first rose, Luke S interrupts her and pulls her aside. He tells her to be careful then leaves!!! Didn’t see that coming!!! Then CH surprises me by taking a rose away from the pile! They are really trimming the fat tonight! JPJ and Matteo (who??? I had to look him up online to find out who he was cause I couldn’t place his face!!!) get sent home. Maybe now JPJ will have time to wash his hair.
I am gobsmacked that Luke P gets a rose. Either AH is insane or the producers made her do it. When they are all drinking their champagne LP tries to make a toast and it just falls FLAT because not a single guy likes him. Even AH looks over him.
AH & the guys head to Scotland where the guys are staying in this amazing estate. They are all in a pub in town having a pint when AH shows up. She declares she doesn’t want any more drama (good luck with that!) and takes Mike out for a 1-1 date. He’s all smiles and they tour the town, drink some whiskey and eat haggis (GROSS). At Fake Dinner that night, Mike says he hasn’t been in love for “half a decade”. Uh ok, that’s just 5 years. Settle down. It’s cute how nervous he is though.
Cut to the estate where the group date card is being read. Luke P isn’t on the group date card so he’s getting a 1-1. He says ” After this I’ll find out if I really want to be here or not.” Ummm, didn’t you practically profess your love on the first date??? And now you don’t know if you want to be here or not?? Upon hearing this, one of the guys calls LP a “Douche Canoe” !!!! Hilarious!!!!
Back to Fake Dinner- Mike says he can see himself proposing so of course he gets the rose.
The next day is the group date at a castle where they are competing in the classic Celtic Highland Games. The guys are all visibly relieved to be out of the house without Psycho LP. The guys are all dressed in kilts and NONE choose to keep on their undies. So there are lots of black boxes flying across my screen trying to keep the guys’ junk under wraps! Tyler wins the axe throwing competition. Then there’s a race where they have to carry milk in buckets. Jed pours the milk all over himself and AH finds that to be hot but who wants to smell like milk??? Then they all wrestle each other but Jed says he wants to wrestle AH. Just an excuse to get her on the ground where he steals a kiss. It’s announced that somehow Jed wins the whole games (which I don’t get, but ok).
That night at the after party AH is a little horndog!!! FIrst she is straddling Jed while wearing this bronze lame` skintight dress. Jed’s grabbing some serious ass. Then she’s making out with Peter (who keeps forgetting he’s MY boyfriend) on a pool table. I can’t keep count with everyone she’s playing tonsil hockey with. Jed gets the rose.
Luke P’s 1-1 is next. Before he leaves he tries to joke with the guys but they aren’t having it. Garrett tells LP to not talk about any of them on his date. LP meets up with AH and they have a fake picnic on a cliff overlooking the ocean. It’s really quite beautiful and I hate it’s wasted on the empty soulless shell that is Luke P. His blank stares just creep me out to no end!!! And he’s SUCH a liar. AH is going to KICK herself when she watches this season back. She’s trying to talk to him and get him to express his emotions but she’s saying some weird things like “do you like spaghetti or macaroni and cheese more”? WHAT???? LP tells her “everyone loves me” and he has no idea why all the guys hate him. He talks in circles with no substance. That night at Fake Dinner I can’t believe when he actually says to AH “I’m not getting the real you. I’m not trying to blame you”. Oh that’s good to know LP. Write your ticket home. AH tells him she can’t give him the rose and his dead psycho eyes just stare back at her in utter shock.
Next week AH apparently goes into the ugly cry because someone messed up big time. But who?? And why is LP still here???? So. Many. Questions!!!
Until then my BBs….xo 🌹

Ghosts

Being ghosted is no fun. Being ghosted by a BFF, dear, or close friend is even worse. I am a good friend. I’m kind and thoughtful and keep in touch. But over the last 3 years I’ve been ghosted by 2 close girlfriends. It hurts. Especially when you don’t know why.

Friend 1 and I texted almost daily and met for lunch monthly, then every 2 weeks, then once a week as our friendship grew. We met about 8 years ago when we were both working on the same team. We hit it off immediately. I even went to her husband’s milestone birthday party. Then she and her family moved about 2 hours away about 2 years ago. There were promises of meeting up in the middle and visits to both cities. But that never happened. She moved and then I just never heard from her again. It was so odd to me. How can you go from talking (via text) almost daily and seeing each other once a week to nothing? We didn’t have a falling out or argument or anything. Trust me I overanalyzed everything trying to figure out if I had done something wrong, something to offend, anything. Last December, when I posted on social media the end of our adoption effort she commented out of the blue her condolences. But nothing since then.

Friend 2 and I met just over 12 years ago at a Bunco party. We also hit it off right away. We became fast friends. She lived just around the corner from us and we started hanging out to watch movies, and tv together. We went out to eat, shopping, and even went on a couple girls trips together. She was my best friend. We talked all the time. Then she and her family moved 1200 miles away about 4 (?? I’m so bad with time) years ago. We still talked on the phone regularly and texted daily and even wrote old fashioned letters to each other. We sent care packages on birthdays. Then about a year ago she went through a divorce. It was really traumatic for her, but we stayed in touch. Until about 6 months ago. Again, nothing happened. No argument or event occurred that would end our friendship. She just stopped answering my texts, or would answer weeks later. A month or so ago I finally asked via text why are you ignoring my texts. She wrote back immediately and swore she wasn’t. That she was just busy and would forget to reply or would think she did reply when she didn’t. So I texted her back and caught her up on all the goings on in my life. I haven’t heard back.

It’s awful. I loved these women like sisters. Especially friend 2. I knew and cared about their families. It’s funny, I still keep up with an ex family member of Friend 2 on social. I miss these ladies. Especially Friend 2. I miss my best friend. I have other girlfriends, but not a BEST friend and that stings.

So if you’re reading this and are currently ghosting a girlfriend, please don’t. Please just be a grown up and tell her what’s going on. No one likes to be left hanging.

Bachelorette Week 4

Week 4 is upon us and we’re down to 15 guys. Chris Harrison makes an appearance to tell the guys they are getting out of the mansion and heading to Rhode Island and you’d think CH just gave everyone first class tickets to Bali the way these guys were hooting and carrying on. It’s Rhode Island. Simmer down.
Jed gets the first 1-1 and it’s in Boston. Wait, what? Is there NOTHING to do in RI? And if so, why didn’t they just stay in Boston? Is the budget that tight ABC, that you can’t spring for a Hampton Inn in Boston? Weird. Anyway, Jed and Alabama Hannah walk around Boston and hold up. I have to say something about AH’s studded, spikey leather jacket. She’s really into leather this season. Maybe it’s just me but I would think that a studded, spikey jacket would make it hard & a wee bit painful to cuddle?? Ok, back to this date. Jed & AH tour the city with AH spouting fake historical tidbits. The poor girl didn’t even have a firm grasp on the Boston tea party! Yikes. Just when I am starting to think their entire date is just one big Halo Top commercial, they go and play basketball with a couple of the Boston Celtics. One of the players sits down with AH and gives her relationship advice, which is pretty funny considering the reputation most NBA players have for NOT being monogamous.
That night at fake dinner the food looks awfully shiny. Is it plastic? Wait a second, is Jed really saying that the show is a huge platform for his music right now??? DUDE. You can think that all you want but you don’t come right out and say it! Haven’t you seen this show? You’re supposed to be here for the “right reasons”!!! Pity, I was really liking them together. They seem to really like each other and get along great and are comfortable together. But then, AH completely surprises me and thanks Jed for his honesty!!! WHAT?!? AND he gets the rose! I’m gobsmacked.
The next day is a group date and the guys are playing rugby today at a fort. Rugby is a rough sport to say the least. No pads. No helmets. No time outs. Just a mouth guard and more brutal physical contact than these pretty boys have seen in months! The guys have all turned into insane primal animals with all the screaming and grunting. Someone is gonna get hurt. Sure enough Kevin takes a hit and dislocates his shoulder and AH is practically drooling over his pain. She’s gone equally insane- yelling for blood, sweat and tears. Luke P is playing dirty and he body slams Luke S into the ground then knees him in the face. This is the most camera time Luke S has had all season so I’m just now noticing that he reminds me a lot of Chucky from the Rugrats, minus the red hair and glasses.
That night at the cocktail party, AH shows up wearing this heinous silver satin suit with no shirt underneath so she’s clearly taped in. The big topic of conversation amongst the group is Luke v. Luke. Luke P flat out lies to AH about Luke S’s intentions, saying he’s just there to promote his liquor business. Aren’t they all though? Luke P can not keep his lies straight about the body slam and knee in the face. But even though Luke S defends himself to AH, you can tell she’s got something going for Luke P and Luke S is not long for the Bachelor world. Somehow Garrett ends up with the rose.
The next day is Tyler C’s 1-1 and he shows up to find AH weeping on a dock. Like snotty nose crying. She even tells the camera her strongest feelings are for psycho Luke P. I feel like slapping her back to reality.
Tyler gives AH a pep talk and they go out on a lobster boat. Ty keeps her laughing and it’s really sweet. That night Tyler shows up for dinner in pants so tight you can read his debit card number through them. He gets the rose.
The next night is the Rose Ceremony and cocktail party. My boyfriend Peter is just so cute I can’t stand it! He asks AH to be his girlfriend and it is so sweet that I allow it, even though I claimed Peter for myself back in week 1. Sigh. I’m so generous. AH’s hair is a hot mess tonight, all in her face and what not.
ALL the guys are hating on Luke P (and with good reason). Mike confronts LP, who has this slack jawed open mouthed psycho stare that is seriously giving me the chills and he’s sitting there with his little fist all clenched. Crazy. Eyes. And he’s SUCH a lying liar who lies to AH and the guys and America.
AH pulls both Lukes aside for a big talk and my pen is poised to take notes but we are ROBBED because it’s the end of the episode!!! Dammit ABC!!! We have to wait until next week for the Rose Ceremony. You know Luke S is going home, along with a couple randos. We shall see! Until next week BBs, xo 🌹