Mother Clucker

So, this has been a tough week.  And I’ve had tough weeks before.  Hell, I’ve had a tough few years.  But this week, with Sara’s health.  And something else happened.  There’s this thing I’ve been working toward.  We’ll call it the chicken.  So for the last almost 2 years I’ve been trying to get this chicken.  I’ve put in countless hours, spent lots of money, jumped through hoops, all for the chicken.  Well this week, a day after finding out Sara’s bad test results, I found out that the people who are in charge of giving me the chicken won’t give me the chicken.  They changed their rules and are now completely out of the chicken business.  And there’s nothing I can do.  Nothing.  The chicken company won’t budge.  And this is a life changing chicken.  I mean, this is the motha cluckin chicken of all chickens.  At least for me.  So the last couple of days have been full of lots of poultry tears and worry and stress and loss.

And now I’m tired.  I know that this is my blog.  And I can write whatever I want on it.  And I started it as my journal.  But it is depressing me to think oh, I need to blog today and then think I have nothing good to say.  Nothing good has happened to me in so long.  Don’t get me wrong, I count my blessings.  I thank God every night for CSP, my family, my friends (including y’all), my pugs, etc.  But not one goal or hope or dream has worked out for me in YEARS.  And this chicken business is almost enough to push me over the edge.  I need a break.  I’m on Facebook and I have email and I’ll check all that a couple times a week.  But I need some time to just be unplugged.  Step back and focus on small things.  Like organizing my linen closet perhaps.  I need to create small victories for myself.

I’ll be back.  I haven’t been keeping this blog going for over 7 years to abandon it now.  I won’t be back tomorrow.  I’m not one of those drama queens who declare blog breaks only to be back in a day.  No, fixing up this old bird is gonna take a good while.  In the meantime, take care and thank you for being there for me.

*Just a quick edit to say that the Chicken has nothing to do with our adoption.  And thank you for all your supportive comments and emails. xoxo

26 thoughts on “Mother Clucker

  1. Shanny, I’m sorry for your stress.
    Know that you have lots of love and support here.
    We’ll miss your updates, but we understand that you just need to unplug.
    Take the time you need for yourself and your family and take heart knowing that we’ll be praying for you and waiting for your bloggy return.
    Hugs-Nikki

  2. I’m ready to come south to personally give you a big hug! If you ever want to vent, chat, etc., please feel free to contact me. I hope you find some peace in the up-coming days. I’ll be thinking of you.

  3. I’m sorry for the bad news you got…a break from blogging can be such freeing thing sometimes. I hope you feel better soon and get some other things done.

  4. So sorry for all the heartache. If you want to take a short trip to ATL give me a call. We could have a nice leisurely lunch and just chill. XOXO

  5. I’m so sorry Shannon. I’m in the same place right now. Things are sucking and I don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel and I am tired.

    Totally understand how you feel.

    And I’m so sorry about the chicken. Truly sorry.

  6. I’m so sorry about all of your chicken business. I’m so, so sorry darling. We should get together…meet in Atlanta, the four of us for a weekend. (((hugz))) I’ll see you on facebook, my friend.

  7. As one of my best friends used to say, “Some days it’s chicken, some days it’s feathers.” It’ll be chicken for you some day. It will. In the mean time, I’ll keep praying for you.

  8. Oh sweetie I am so so sorry… I wish I could give you huge hugs in person and deliver a big margarita or mojito for you. Until then, just know I’m thinking about you.

  9. I am thinking about you and praying for you. I loved the “create small victories” statement. That comment reassures me that you are such a strong and intelligent woman and are going to come out of this victorious. I know that light is hard to see but I see it for you. Love you girl!

  10. See? This is why I am a vegetarian. j/k. I love you SHannon and I am so sorry about the (mysterious) chicken. And about your other unclaimed (as of yet) goals. This is your year girl. I just know it. I KNOW it. If I can help in anyway (seriously), please ask.

  11. damn. i’m so sorry. sorry i haven’t commented in so long, been absent from you for so long. i’m on FB too… how do i find you there?

  12. I understand the need for a break. Took a long one myself and it worked wonders. My love to you as you heal yourself a little…

    Sorry about your chicken.

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