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Bachelor Week 7

BBs it is week 7 of Clayton’s journey to find love, or at least a girlfriend for 6 months.

Sarah is back from her 2nd 1-1 and is on a mission to find out who ratted her out to Clayton about her not being ready for marriage. Sarah confronts the group and Mara fesses up. The next night at the pre- Rose Ceremony Cocktail Party, Mara pulls Sarah aside so they can fuss at each other some more. The other girls trying to listen in is the funniest part.

Rose Ceremony: Going home- Mara (shocker! I told you!) and cutie Eliza. We hardly knew ye, Eliza.

This episode feels like I’m watching it on hyper speed because next thing you know we are in Vienna, Austria. So beautiful!

Susie’s 1-1

Susie gets the Cinderella shopping trip date that they do on every season of the Bachelor. They go to these posh boutiques and Susie gets to pick out all kinds of fancy clothes and she acts like it was Clayton’s idea and he’s footing the bill! Susie and Clayton wind up at a designer’s private gallery and Susie tries on all sorts of haute couture gowns. Oh, and she gets some Christian Louboutins!!! Shoot, I’d make out with ol’ Clay for some red bottoms! Susie changes into a haute couture gown for Fake Dinner and gets the rose.

Group Date

The theme of today’s group date is couples’ therapy! Bizarre, as each of the couples are BARELY couples. So each lady has to sit down with Clayton and a psychoanalyst. Poor Genevieve looks like a deer in headlights during her session. She can barely open her mouth she’s so nervous. And instead of offering support or encouragement, Clay’s all “you gotta open up to me or we can’t work”. DUDE, she’s spent a total of 30 minutes with you! I can’t even tell you his birthday and I’ve been watching all season!!! He tells Genevieve they’ve run out of time and sends her home. Trust me when I tell you that you’ve dodged a bullet there Gene! Meanwhile, Sarah is SUPER cocky and sucks up to the psychoanalyst who sees right through her and declares to Clayton and the ladies at the end that one woman was “performative”. 3 guesses who!

After Party

Rachel tells Clayton that Sarah told the group he cried on his 1-1 with Sarah. Gabby and Teddi confirm this information and big boy C is NOT having it! How dare Sarah imply that Clay showed weakness or feelings or emotion?!?! Sarah, of course, denies all this to Clayton but he says I don’t believe you. He tells her he thinks she’s fake crying and Sarah says “I’ve run out of tears” (!!!) chef’s kiss!!! This is the kind of petty I want to see!!! Clayton sends Sarah home and does not give out the Group Date rose.

Serene 1-1

Serene’s 1-1 goes by so fast all I can tell you about it is that they toured the city, had Fake Dinner at a palace and she got the rose! Seriously, I know their date lasted all day but on tv it lasted one hot minute!

Rose Ceremony

Teddi goes home. Noooooo!!! I really liked Teddi!!! I was rooting for you girl!!!

Next up is Hometowns! One of my favorite episodes! Until then, xo. ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Week 6

Week 6 BBs picks back up with the 2-1 with Shanae and Genevieve at Niagra Falls. This really isn’t a date at all but just 2 separate conversations, then a decision. Shanae tells Clayton that Genevieve is an actress who said she wanted to go home! This, of course, couldn’t be farther from the truth. But Shanae turns on the tears and she and Clay make out. Meanwhile, back at the hotel, the other girls are all on suitcase watch, waiting to find out which suitcase will be taken away- signifying who is going home. Genevieve cries when she’s with Clayton too. Then Clay sits both ladies down and asks Genevieve RIGHT IN FRONT OF Shanae (!!!) if Genevieve is an actress and wants to go home! I swear, he’s dumb as a box of hair! Genevieve is shook and denies it and Clay decides he needs to step away and think. He takes a few moments to himself then comes back to the ladies and gives…..Genevieve the rose! Genevieve looks visibly shocked! I am visibly shocked! Shanae is visibly shocked! Then, in classic 2-1 fashion, Clay and Genevieve leave Shanae there alone on the bench while they go off to makeout by the falls. Now, I have to give Genevieve some props because if some dude accused me of being an actress then tried to stick his big, meaty tongue down my throat—I would NOT be in the mood! Back at the hotel, the PA comes and gets Shanae’s suitcase and the other girls all cheer and scream. One even yells “Ding dong the shrimp is dead!” Bahahahaha!!!!

Cocktail Party

Mara is dressed in a knock off Olympic figure skater’s dress tonight and I can’t take my eyes off the gross skin colored mesh! Bleh! Mara gets literally like 2 minutes with Clayton before Serene interrupts, and this sends her off in frustrated tears.

Rose Ceremony

Going home: Hunter and Marlena

After the rose ceremony Clayton tells the women they are all taking off to Hvar, Croatia and they all scream but you can see on their faces they are trying to figure out what Hvar is! Bless!

Teddi gets the first 1-1 in Hvar and yay! It’s about time! Mara, is NOT nearly as thrilled as I am for old Teds though. Teddi and Clay walk around the town in the rain.

Fake Dinner

Teddi tells Clayton that not only has she never been in love, but that she’s a virgin. Clay’s face instantly goes beet red and he’s stuttering and sputtering! Get yourself together man! She’s a virgin, not an alien! Teddi gets the rose.

Group Date

The ladies have to dress up as Croatian knights and go through a series of quests. There’s push her out of the circle feat of strength, then the eating of liver and fish eyes, then the knight’s creed where the ladies have to tell Clayton how they feel about him. Serene wins the knight challenge.

Night

Clayton shows up to the after party in a zip up shirt under his sport jacket. His stylist is making some really questionable choices.

Mara sits Clay down and unloads on him. WHOA. She basically says that he’s acting like he wants a wife and maturity but he’s choosing all these young girls. Specifically Sarah. Then Mara tells Clay that Sarah said she’s not ready to be engaged. Not true. ****NEW VILLAIN ALERT**** Girl, have you NOT seen the show??? The women who talk smack about the other girls do not make it to the end! Shanae had a 6 week run, something I’ve never seen before, but that girl was GOOD at being bad!!! Sure enough, Rachel gets the rose.

Later that night, Clayton gets a note under his door. Meet me at the clock tower. He goes and Susie is waiting for him. They climb the tower and chat and she tells him she’s falling in love with him.

Sarah’s 2nd 1-1

This is a pitiful date. There’s no activity. No real dinner. Just Clayton confronting Sarah at Fake Dinner about whether or not she’s ready for marriage at 23 years of age. Clay tells Sarah it’s been brought to his attention that she can’t see herself engaged and she instantly starts crying. Clay has to step away for a bit to think again. Girl, you’re only 23!!! Don’t hitch your wagon to this lump so soon! Live your life!!! Clay comes back and gives her the rose.

And that’s it until next week BBs! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Week 5

Welcome back to the Shanae Show BBs!!! Oh you thought you were tuning in to the Bachelor? That’s before Clayton put on blinders and fell for Shanae! But before we get to that…

Serene 1-1

Clayton and Serene (who is SO TINY) go to an amusement park on a beach pier in Galveston. They have all the rides and games to themselves and appear to have a great time. At Fake Dinner, Serene tells Clay about how her cousin she was really close to passed away and that it really affected her. Clay gives Serene the rose.

Cocktail Party

Clay takes the winning team from last week’s Group Date aside and asks them what happened with Shanae. They tell him about her hurling expletives and hurling their trophy into a pond. He says that that behavior is unacceptable. Clay pulls Shanae aside and she actually tells the truth! She’s all “I said what I said, you heard me!” Clay makes her go back out to the ladies and apologize. So Shanae stands in front of the ladies and releases a flood of crocodile tears with a truly heartfelt apology. Yeah right. As soon as she’s back with Clayton there are no tears and once she’s talking one on one with the producers she says “Sorry NOT SORRY you HOS”!!! Keeping it Klassy!

A few of the ladies actually accept her apology but come on. It’s Shanae the she devil! She is faking it!! Shanae goes back and reports to Clay that she apologized and they make out. UGH. What kind of hold does she have over him?? Does he owe her money???

Rose Ceremony

Obviously all the girls are chomping at the bit for Shanae to go home, but she gets the last rose again!!! At this point I’m not even surprised! Shanae even tells the camera “My vagina is sweating”. She makes my skin crawl. Such a lady!!!

Going home: Sierra, Jill, and Lyndsey (who looks like she could be Britney Spears’ sister).

Next we are told we are taking it international! Where to, you ask?? Toronto!!! That’s just Canada! International! Bahahaha!!!

Gabby 1-1

Gabby and Clayton take a helicopter tour of Toronto, then walk around the city. Every. Single. Thing. this girl does… Clayton acts like it’s the funniest thing he’s ever witnessed! I mean, she’s cute and can act silly but he’s not dating Jim Carrey!!! Gabby gets the rose at Fake Dinner.

Group Date

The ladies are tasked with performing a roast in front of an audience. They are to roast each other and Clayton. They DO NOT hold back while roasting Shanae, who isn’t there. One girl compares Shanae with herpes! And one blasts that Hunter has IBS! Dude! Below the belt!!! Rachel gets the group date rose at the after party.

Shanae/ Genevieve 2-1

Shanae, Genevieve, and Clayton go to Niagra Falls for their date. Shanae does some trash talking to the camera about Gene, comparing her to a chihuahua!!! But as for the date, we’ll have to wait for next week!!!

Until then BBs, xoxo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Week 4

More nonsense this week BBs! Week 4 begins with Clayton taking Shanae and Elizabeth aside to hash out their shrimp differences. Yes loves, ABC has subjected us to 2 solid weeks of what the ladies in the house are referring to as “Shrimpgate”. LORD HELP ME!!! As you can imagine, Eliz and Shanae just verbally assault each other while Clayton looks like he’d rather be anywhere else on Earth right now. He finally gets up and walks away and the ladies don’t miss a beat. They keep on harping on each other. Eliz rejoins the other ladies and Shanae follows, eating a plate of shrimp! Bahahaha!!! Clayton cancels the cocktail party and all the women blame Shanae, with good reason! Shanae gets the last rose and going home are Elizabeth, Melina, and Kira (who???)! HOW is Clayton so blind and dumb??


Jesse Palmer comes in the next morning to announce that the ladies are going on a world wide trip! Yay! To Houston!!! What??? The women try and look excited to be hopping a 3 hour flight to Texas instead of, well, anywhere else!


Rachel’s 1-1


Rachel (who’s wearing so much lip gloss I’m afraid she’s going to asphyxiate) and Clayton go horseback riding and “come upon” some random family’s barbeque. They crash the bbq and ask if they can stay and eat. They apparently spend the afternoon eating these poor people’s food and drinking their beer. It’s the first real food I’ve seen eaten on this show since 1887! Later they go to Fake Dinner and Rachel gets the rose.


Group Date


All the girls arrive to the Houston football stadium where there are lots of grills plugged into Hyundai cars. Odd product placement but ok. Everyone tailgates for a while until they are told they will be playing tackle football today. Not flag, not touch, but full on tackle to the ground football. There will be MUCH bloodshed today folks, because Shanae is a part of this group date and the other women are seething over her!


Winners of the game get to go to the after party with Clayton. Of course, Marlena the Olympian’s team wins. Sierra and Marlena basically ran all over those other poor girls. Guess who’s not on the winning team?? Shanae. Whomp whomp!


Afterparty


Sierra and Genevieve tell Clayton that Shanae is the cause of all the strife in the house when they have their separate time with him. Then, surprise! Shanae crashes the after party, saying “I deserve to be here.” NO YOU DO NOT!!! Clayton tells Shanae what the other girls have said and she comes back with “Yeah but they were plotting against me!” so Clayton puts Shanae up on a bar and they make out, as you do. WHY IS HE SO BLIND???? UGH.


After, Shanae goes out to the group of women and grabs their football trophy and hurls it into the bushes. She says “This isn’t the Bachelor, it’s the Shanae show!” And folks, we’ll have to deal with her for yet another week because that is the end of the episode!


Until next week, xoxo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Week 3

It’s week 3 BBs! We pick up at the rose ceremony with Cassidy and her FWB (friend with benefits) drama. Clayton asks Jesse if he can take away Cassidy’s rose & Jesse says there are no rules. So Clayton pulls Cassidy to talk and of course she denies having a relationship with anyone. Then she admits it. Clayton sends her home.


Rose Ceremony


Shanae gets the last rose. Going home: Ency, Tessa (who??), and Kate.


Group Date #1


The ladies file into a dark room then sit in a circle. Kaitlin Bristowe is there to host the date, and of course Clayton is there. Everyone has to talk about their body insecurities. Poor Hunter talks about how an ex made her wear colored contacts and dye her hair! Good grief! By the end of it everyone is crying. It’s a v supportive environment and even Clayton shares some body insecurities.


Night


Clayton shows up to the after party in another hoodie/suit combo. WHO is his stylist??? This is a horrible combo!!! Eliza gets the group date rose.


Sarah’s 1-1


All of the body positivity from yesterday is completely squashed by today’s date. C and Sarah are forced to run around LA in their underwear on an extreme scavenger hunt. GROAN. Why in their undies??? How gratuitous!!!


Fake Dinner is at the Van Gogh immersive exhibit and it is beautiful. Sarah talks about how she was adopted and how she always felt like second choice. She gets the rose.


Group Date #2


Today’s date takes place at the beach. The ladies all have to change into the iconic Baywatch red swimsuits and you’d think C’s eyes were going to pop out of his head! Again, any positive ground gained the other day is now lost. SIGH. Shanae keeps talking about how this is all a contest and how she’s gonna win.


Night


Gabby talks C into taking his shirt off so she can rub aloe on him and I am so tired of seeing his nips!


Shanae tells Clayton she’s being bullied in the house and that Elizabeth is the ring leader. This, of course, is not true. But Clayton confronts Eliz who melts into tears because every conversation she has with C is about Shanae drama. Meanwhile, Shanae tells the camera “Oh I am SO good. I even cried! He believed me!!” This girl is ballsy! I’m so excited for the women tell all episode already because of her!


Shanae and Eliz get into it about the drama, but we’ll have to wait until next week to see what happens!


Until then BBs! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Week 2

It’s week 2 BBs and it’s time for dates and drama! First, the women move into the Bachelor mansion and they are extremely excited about it.


Group Date #1


Hilary Duff hosts the date. The ladies are tasked to set up a little girl’s birthday party. Cassidy is supposed to help set up a play house but flat out refuses. “I’m not here to hang streamers”. Instead she drags Clayton out of sight of the other ladies to the pool where they make out for a half hour. The two of them rejoin the group long enough for Cassidy to DROP THE CHILD’S BIRTHDAY CAKE ON THE GROUND!!! The same cake that Genevieve spent an hour decorating!!! None of this earns Cass any points with the women, who are currently plotting her death.


Night


Clayton arrives at the after party in a hoodie and a sports jacket and I’m so confused!!! WHO is his stylist??? Such an odd pairing. The girls confront Cassidy about her behavior that day and our girl Cass DOES. NOT. CARE. She makes it v v clear she is here for one thing only and that is not making friends. Somehow Cassidy gets the group date rose and the other ladies are LIVID.


Susie’s 1-1


Susie LUCKS OUT on her date! She and C take a helicopter to a yacht to spend the day! They hang in the hot tub, swim, and make out. It’s not really all that noteworthy TBH. Susie reminds me SO much of Hannah B! And she says “LIKE” so much my head like hurts listening to her like, talk. She gets the rose.


Group Date #2


When the group date card is read out loud and Jill’s name isn’t on it, she cries tears and complains about how she left her friends and family and CAT! Bahahaha!!! Classic.
The group enters a room where a comedian is waiting to host the date. Ziwe is her name. Elizabeth sits next to Clayton and Shanae is so upset that she didn’t think of that move. Shanae spends her time glaring at Eliz and C flirting during the whole date. The group plays Never Have I Ever and then the girls have to complete an obstacle course. At one point Shanae shoves Eliz to the ground. Sarah wins the course.


Night


Shanae decides Eliz doesn’t like her anymore so she tells Clayton that Eliz isn’t here for the right reasons. Shanae then tells the camera ” We’re in a competition and I want to win”. Nice. SO of course Clayton tells Eliz and then Eliz confronts Shanae. Shanea then tells all the girls that Eliz has ADHD. Again, how v nice of her, right? Sarah gets the Group Date rose.


Cocktail Party


Shanae & Eliz’s drama is STILL going on. UGH. Even Cassidy, who up to this point has been coaching Shanae in how to win, tells her to cut her losses. Cassidy has some drama of her own though because she apparently forgets she’s being filmed and tells another girl that she has a FWB at home!!! *Friend with benefits. AND this FWB just FaceTimed with Cass the day before filming. They spoke of plans for when she gets home. This info gets back to Clayton because OF COURSE IT DOES and Clayton goes to Jesse Palmer and asks “Has anyone ever taken back a rose??”. Meanwhile Cassidy is with the women saying “What’s he gonna do? I have a rose!” YIKES.


We have to wait 2 weeks to find out what happens BBs! Until then, xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelor Season Premiere

BBs!!! It’s time for another season of the Bachelor! With the most boring Bachelor ever!!! But I’m a glutton for punishment, so here we are.


We have a new host- Jesse Palmer. UGH. I wanted Wells to be the new host, but you can’t always get what you want.


We start with a twist- a big one! One of the contestants, Salley, (that e is KILLING me) was formerly engaged and was supposed to be married yesterday!!! She’s debating leaving when she decides to go to Clayton’s room to meet him and talk. And they let her!!! This is unprecedented! So Salley tells C her story and that she may leave. C excuses himself for a moment and comes back with a rose!!! He offers her the rose, she says can I think on it, leaves the room for a while, comes back and TURNS HIM DOWN!!! Then she leaves the show. I have emotional whiplash from the whole thing!!!


Limo entrances


Note- we are back at the LA mansion. I wrote down all the ladies’ names, ages, and occupations but y’all don’t need all that. Lemme just skip to the good stuff.


Kate, 32, walks up to C and whips out 2 airplane bottles of booze FROM HER BRA!!! She then forces the poor man to do a shot from one and calls the bottles her nips!!!


Melina, 27, literally JUMPS on the man in moon shoes. Girl catches air!


Jill, 26, brings an urn and says they are “the ashes of my ex-boyfriends in case you make the same mistake.” Okayyyyy.


Ivana, 31, walks up completely silent and just mimes to him a bit then walks inside. Note- her occupation? Bar Mitzvah dancer.


Kira, 32, a physician, walks up in her doctor coat and red bra and underwear. That’s it!


Gabby, 30, brings a pillow with C’s face on it and literally says on national tv “I just want to sit on your face”. DYING.


Hunter, 28, from Charlotte! Brings a giant yellow snake wrapped around her neck. Y’all, that first night is a LONG one and you know that snake had to poop at some point!


I do have to say, there’s lots of diversity among the women and that’s progress, even if the ladies are acting like they haven’t seen a man in the flesh since March 2020.


Cocktail Party


Teddi (my favorite) gets the first kiss.


Claire talks with Clayton and they play cornhole. Then another lady walks up to steal him away. Afterwards, Claire goes around the house telling everyone that her time with him was awful and she can’t marry America’s sweetheart!!! Honey, America’s sweetheart is QUITE the stretch, but I get where you’re coming from. Another girl tells C about the bad mouthing and C sends Claire home.


Teddi gets the 1st impression rose! Yay!!!


Rose Ceremony


The sun is coming up!!! I told y’all it’s a long night!!! Serene gets the first rose. She is stunning. Going home: Ivana, Daria, Hailey, Jane, Lindsay D, Rianna, and Samantha.
Then ABC does the whole “this season on the Bachelor” thing and shows the entire show again! We KNOW what’s going to happen so why watch??? UGH ABC, you don’t get it!!!


And that’s it until next week BBs!!! xo๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Finale

It’s the finale BBs! While social media spoiled the ending for me, I still had to watch! AND Hulu didn’t have the finale for some reason so I had to sit through commercials and lost 3 hours of my life!!! So settle in folks!


It’s almost time for Michelle to pick her man, but first Nayte and Brandon have to meet her parents. Brandon’s already met them if you remember, in Minnesota. This time around he pours on the charm and they fall in love with him right before my eyes. I mean, they are ready to adopt the man!


Nayte’s meeting doesn’t go as well. In fact, it’s a dumpster fire. Dad’s hatred of Nayte is only outmatched by Mom’s. In fact, Mom tells Michelle Nayte is not open with his feelings OR ready for an engagement. Geesh LaVonne, tell us how you really feel! Michelle says she has to rethink her relationship with Nayte.


Next up are the last dates. Brandon and Michelle go on jet skis and then hang out on the beach. Later Michelle goes to Brandon’s suite. Brandon is non-stop with his gushing about how much he loves Michelle. Finally she squeaks out an I love you too, but there’s no heat. Brandon is super sweet and I don’t doubt he would kill for Michelle without a moment’s hesitation, but there’s no spark, no chemistry between them.


Nayte’s last date with Michelle involves a shaman. N & M are supposed to burn sage and say their wishes for each other but Nayte can’t seem to string together a coherent sentence. Michelle is less than impressed. That night in Nayte’s suite they talk and Nayte opens up and Michelle says all her doubts and fears are resolved. When Michelle gets back to her room there’s a sweet letter from Brandon waiting for her. I don’t think it’s going to be enough to save him though. Plus, IMO Brandon’s pants are always way too short!


Sure enough, Brandon is the first man to meet up with Michelle on the beach. And we all know what that means. ABC still makes the poor guy recite his I love you so much speech before they’ll let Michelle break up with him. She’s still saying I love you though! Poor Brandon is BROKEN UP. He’s crying, she’s crying. It’s v v sad. Man’s gonna need a good therapist. He’s a total gentleman about the whole thing though.


Nayte comes out and is looking so v cute in his suit. He proposes, the ring is gorgeous, she says yes then calls him her SoulNayte and I die a little inside.


After The Final Rose


Brandon comes out and we’re forced to watch his heartbreak all over again with him. It’s pitiful! Then Michelle comes out and their outfits match! Bless.


Nayte comes out and joins Michelle. They show M & N’s moms in the audience and they are BFFs now. So cute! Then ABC gives Michelle and Nayte $200k toward their first house! OMG! ABC has mad faith that this will work out!!!


Later, Clayton comes out and they make him read hate tweets about himself. Bless again! It’s funny though. They show a sneak peek of his season but it’s basically the whole season! They’ve left NOTHING to look forward to! But you know I’ll be watching.


See y’all in 2 weeks BBs!!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 9 Recap

It’s Fantasy Suite time BBs!!! For this momentous occasion, ABC flies everyone to Mexico! I find this interesting because why couldn’t they fly to their respective hometowns but Mexico is ok? Hmmmm. Curious.


First up is Brandon. Brandon and Michelle go horseback riding in the jungle then on the beach. I can’t take Brandon seriously. He professes his love for Michelle every 30 seconds. EVERYTHING they do is the MOST ROMANTIC thing he’s ever done. It’s just all so over the top. Case in point, the man literally says “I canโ€™t wait to literally rip my heart out, throw it on the table, and just say, do what you want with it, because it only beats for you at this point.” I MEAN. So the next morning comes and they are fully clothed. Like, he’s in a HOODIE. It’s so G rated it’s almost funny!


Joe is next. Joe’s been agonizing over these Fantasy Suite dates. They go zip lining and Joe screams Michelle’s name over and over! Save it for tonight Joe!!! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Later, Michelle commends Joe on being vulnerable and open and I’m just not seeing that. You can barely hear the man speak! They spend the night together (I mean, what man is turning down the Fantasy Suite?) and that’s about it. Joe is super cute but BORING.


Finally, Nayte is up. Nayte’s been the most relaxed about these dates, saying he focuses on his own connection, which is a smart idea…but he also is just now realizing 2 other guys are in serious relationships with his girlfriend. Yikes. Nayte and Michelle go out on a catamaran on the ocean. Their physical chemistry is palpable. AND Michelle says she has never felt like she does when she kisses Nayte. Uh, Brandon and Joe? Might wanna pack your bags. Nayte and Michelle spend the night together only after Michelle leads Nayte into telling her he loves her over Fake DInner. Mind you he JUST last week told his stepdad who raised him that he loves him FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! The next morning they look like something big went down last night. Michelle says she’s in love with Nayte but I don’t think he’s ready for an engagement, despite what he says. He is still talking about how he’s never been in love until now. Not that you can’t marry your first love but when you’ve only spent a total of 72 hours with someone, it may not work out in the end.


The Rose Ceremony


Nayte gets the first rose, natch. But before that can happen, Brandon pulls Michelle aside to gush about how much he loves her and he’ll be here for her even if she sends him home. Again, it’s just too much!!! BTW, Michelle looks amazing in a sparkly dress that’s giving me mermaid vibes. Brandon gets the last rose. And here is where I predict Michelle is going to pick Nayte at the end. She hasn’t told Brandon she’s in love with him, just Nayte. With Brandon she throws around words like “best friend”. Anyway, Joe goes home crying in the car and I feel badly for him. But he’ll do alright back in Minneapolis I’m sure!!!


Until next week’s 3 hour (LORD HELP ME) finale BBs!!! xo๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Men Tell All

Men Tell All! The Men Tell Alls have been lame the last few seasons so the bar is low ABC. Do your worst! ๐Ÿ˜‚


The show starts out reliving Will (WHO?) and Peter’s (pizza boy) feud. The animosity is high. Then Peter “serves” Will with a defamation of character suit. But it’s so obviously a producer skit. Then they revisit Ryan and his notes from the first night.


It comes out that apparently Martin had a girlfriend while on the show, which is remarkable to me because of his hair and jewelry choices. Also his teeth look like they are fighting for space in his mouth. But I suppose every pot has a lid! They talked to Chris about his speaking for Michelle and all he had to say was that “Maybe I came on a little strong”. Okaaaaay.


Jamie then comes out and is still so sleazy and STILL can’t give a straight answer! Then Rick is up and they bring out the creepiest looking cake that’s supposed to be Rick’s head. Shudder! Rodney is up next and a plant in the audience “streaks” through the crowd yelling “We love you Rodney!”.


Michelle comes out next. All the guys basically line up to apologize to her. Even Jamie gives a pitiful non apology “IF anyone’s feelings were hurt then I’m sorry.” Michelle stays so poised and puts all the jerks on blast.


The bloopers are pretty funny!


Sneak peek of Clayton’s Bachelor season is shown at the end of the show and I’m super annoyed. They literally spoil the whole show! Way to go ABC!!! They show Clayton say he’s falling in love with 2 women and IS in love with one and they’re talking about the final 3! Come on! AND Clayton admits to being intimate with 2 of them. Oy. WHY watch now???


That’s it until next week BBs!!! xo ๐ŸŒน