January 2023 – Bless Your Heart

BBs it is week 2 and that means it’s time for the dates to start! First we have a group date. Latto (a singer ) hosts the date, which is all about Bad Bitch Energy. Okay. There’s dancing and then Victoria, Tahzjuan, and Courtney (who??) from past seasons of the Bachelor arrive to judge the girls on their bad bitchiness. The girls have to bust through these doors and walk down a catwalk to Zach. Basically it’s a bunch of clothed strip teases. Then the ladies have to tell everyone about a time when they were a bad bitch. But we don’t get to hear an entire story, so who knows who’s really a bad bitch?!?

At the after party, Brianna is crying literal tears about wanting validation from Z. Which I get, but it’s just week 2, no need for tears yet! She and Z kiss. Tahzjuan appears and crashes the group date. She asks Z if she can join the group. He says he has to think about it. While he’s thinking, the other girls ask Tahz what she’s doing there. T says the other girls were “painful to watch today”. OMG so mean!! Z sits down with the ladies and tells them that T will NOT be joining them. Yay!!! Katherine gets the group date rose.

1-1 with Christina

Christina and Z take a helicopter to his childhood home. There is a bbq going on for Z’s Mom’s birthday. Christina meets a ton of Z’s family. She’s v confident. That night over Fake Dinner Christina tells Z she has a 6 year old daughter named Blakely. Z starts getting emotional talking about speeding up the plan and becoming an instant father. But he gives her the rose.

Group Date 2

For a second I thought I’d died of boredom or slipped into a coma and missed this group date activity! But no, there really isn’t one! It’s just Z & the girls chatting individually. Which is good for them, but yawn! The entire night Gabi is freaking out about why didn’t he kiss me? Jess gets the group date rose.

Cocktail Party

Brianna is spiraling again, but this time it’s about Christina. Frankly I think Christina has a major unfair advantage since she’s “semi famous”. Anyway, Bri is upset that Christina was able to meet Z’s fam and that Christina told Bri on night one that she hated her, but JK. You gotta have much thicker skin than this to survive being on this show Bri!!! Bri sits down with Z and almost tattles on Christina but Z is not here for that! Then Z tells Bri she’s v strict and serious. Have some fun Bri!!!

Rose Ceremony

Bri gets last rose. Going home: Cat, Victoria (who?), and Kimberly

Until next week my BBs!!! 🌹xo

BBs!!! It’s that time again! The Bachelor with Zach has premiered and I. Have. Thoughts!!! So settle in and let’s get to it! First of all, Zach is so boring. He’s the human equivalent of beige paint. I just can’t with him. BUT his girls, based on this episode, are promising some drama!

Before we can get to meet all of Z’s ladies, Sean Lowe comes to give advice. GROAN. Now, I love Sean. He’s a delight. But he doesn’t know Zach from Adam and WHY is it always Sean?? Are there no other Bachelor men who have had their Bachelor relationship succeed?? Sigh.

Anyway, time for the Limo Entrances! We have 30 women to meet! Some standouts:

Greer talks about herself in the 3rd person and that grates my nerves to NO END.

Brooklyn is a rodeo racer!

Jess is only 23! Has she seen the show? Is she ready to marry this man?? I mean, I know Z is 26 but those 3 years are crucial!

Cat’s extensions are showing.

Genevie is STUNNING and poised. My favorite so far.

Mercedes brought a pig! LOVE!!!

Christina’s mom is a Mandrell sister! I looooved the Mandrells when I was a kid!

Two of the ladies are in the same dress (one pink, one purple).

Christina and Z are on a party bus hanging out when a bunch of the girls, led by Madison, crash their private bus party. Right after Christina and Z had their first kiss.

Speaking of kissing- these ladies got a good smooch: Kaity, Charity, Greer, and Jess (hope her mom’s not watching!).

One girl and Z have a “how many meatballs can you fit in your mouth at once” and while it’s kinda funny, it’s v gross and soooo not sexy!!!

SO. MANY. LIKES. It’s as if “like” is the only word these girls know! It makes them all look so dumb when you know they aren’t!!! Also, there are a million nurses on this show! Which tells me they are smart. So why speak in such a way that makes you look stupid???

Madison steals Z for a second hang out session, much to the chagrin of the other girls. Then she totally forces a kiss on him and he is not feeling it. Neither am I Z. Bless, she’s just coming off as desperate. She picks up on the fact that he’s not into her and spends the rest of the night crying.

Greer gets the First Impression Rose. Not to be confused with America’s First Impression Rose that Brianna won on After the Final Rose.

Later in the night Jesse and Z are chatting when Madison interrupts. She basically asks Z if he likes her and he v politely lets her down easy and sends her home. Then we have to watch for a PAINFULLY long time as Madison walks down the long driveway to the van that’s waiting to take her home. Her heels are clicking and she’s crying the whole way. BLESS.

CSP watched this with me and noted that all the girls look the same. With some exceptions, he’s right! SO many have the same hair it could be a wig they pass around! Long layers with extensions and a middle part. No wonder it’s hard to tell them apart and remember their names!!!

Rose Ceremony

Christina gets the first rose and I realize I’m just not a fan. Cat get’s the final rose of the night and I’m really not a fan of her. Nine ladies go home: Holland, Sonia, Cara, Lekha, Olivia (who?), Olivia M, Becca, Vanessa, and Viktoria.

And that’s it for night one my BBs! Stick with me this season and we just might make it through! My favorite lady remains Genevie. Who’s your stand out at this point??

Until next week!

xo 🌹