When CSP & I decided to adopt I started talking about it on my blog and that drew some new readers from the adoption world. BYH started to appear on blogrolls across Blogistan under “China Adoption” or “Paperchasing” etc. Then we slowed down a bit to figure out the finance end of things a little better. Meanwhile bloggy friends I’d met in the same China adoption boat had sailed on and gotten referrals and children or become LID. Then China booted us out. Then we chose country #2. And now that’s up in the air. And I’ve noticed that BYH doesn’t fit in anymore. On some blogrolls now BYH shows up as “other reads” or something along those lines. And that’s perfectly fine. Hey, it’s an honor to be nominated. But in some ways I feel like we over here at Casa de Heart have been left behind. It’s like everyone else had this great plan and everything went along the way it should except for us. Because as per usual I jumped right in before all the details were ironed out. Funny, I’ve never much cared about keeping up with the Joneses or being labeled. That is, until my label was infertile and non-mom. I know this may seem silly, but I just want BYH and us to end up under the “Parents” category soon.
Bless Your Heart
Living out loud in the Carolinas
Bless Your Heart 
12 responses to “One of these things is not like the other”
Oh Shanny, you will get there. You have so many people out here in blog/cyberland cheering you on. Nothing I can say is adequate. You need to be a mom, and you will be. It just sucks that the path to mommyhood has been so long, bumpy, and full of curves.
I so admire your spirit and sense of humor. As long as you have those things, you can manage anything life throws at you!
Hugs from Krista and Becca
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I don’t have any of the sites I read daily on my web page, but if I did yours would still be under the adoption catagory. I think of your site as an adoption site and look forward to your updates. It may seem like everyone else is right there moving forward, but a lot of us just didn’t write in the early stages when things were slowing down, not going the way we planned or at a complete stand still. Just think of yourself as an early bloomer and what a great record you will have of your journey to show your children someday. Good luck!
Tracy
http://www.ameliarae.com and http://www.jacklouis.net
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You’re ‘waiting’ on my list along with the rest of us. One of these days we’ll make it into the ‘Home’ list. Hang in…there’s plenty of us to hang with you along the way :0)
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I look at your site as a fun blog to read and a part of that blog is your adoption journey. I know what you mean though…we’ve had some challenges with conceiving as well and I don’t even go there on my blog because I don’t really want to be labeled either. But, you’re brave so go girl!
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If I had categories. You would be in the pug and human MOM category. It doesnt matter that you dont have your human baby yet. You will.
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Oh, and you’d be in the crafty category. By the way, will your hands ever be good enough to go back to making jewelry?
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Shanny, i totally understand how you feel. When we were TTC, I was the only person we knew that didn’t have a baby yet. Then we were adopting and I didn’t know anyone else who was….. It will come, you WILL BE A MOMMY!!! You deserve to be a mommy! If i had categories, you’d be in my mommy to be one, or adoption, but mostly the “she makes me want to laugh my ass off” category!
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Oh Shanny – try not to let it bother you (I know, it’s hard). There really ARE so many folks who are sending you good thoughts out here in Blogistan (never heard that before!). And as another commenter said – you already ARE a mommy, your little girl just isn’t with you yet.
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Hmmmmmm…. You are still in my waiting family list!!! You will get you baby, just don’t lose hope.
Lisa
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what the heck is BYH? Hehehe… and to me you are just Shanny from the Carolinas… don’t need to add anything else to that because you are special just the way you are in my book… and everything will work out =)
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Big hugs sweetie – it sucks to feel left behind and have no control over it. You are going to be an absolutely wonderful mom someday (soon I hope) and I cannot wait to celebrate with you.
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I think this is the first time I’ve commented in your site but I read it all the time. I have two adopted daughters but my road to Parentland was not easy either. Once I was so depressed I cried in front of our social worker who calmly said, “In all my years of doing this, I can say I learned that if you stick with this process you WILL become a parent. I don’t know how or when but it WILL happen.” I found that comforting and wanted to pass it on to you. You WILL be a great mom!
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