Bless Your Heart

J: Don’t drink the milk in the jug with the white label.

Shannon: Ok. Why not?

J: Because it’s out of date by 2 days and even though it’s just fine , I know how you are about not wanting to eat spoiled food.

*Note that he says this last part in a hoighty toighty voice like I’m too good to eat spoiled food. Like it’s crazy of me to not want to eat spoiled food. Gosh, I’m such a prima donna huh? I mean, come on, just because I’d like my milk creamy and not chunky all the sudden I’m such a food snob? Of course, this is all coming from the man who will eat anything in a tupperware dish a full week after I make it for dinner. He’ll scrutinize the ingredients on an out of date bottle of salad dressing and deem it safe for consumption as long as at least one of the ingredients is vinegar or salt. “Ach, it’s fine. It will be fine a year from now.” Maybe on your salad mister, but not on mine.