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Bachelorettes Week 2

It is week 2 BBs! Y’all ready?? Let’s go!!! First up we have the Group Date. IF you can call it that! Remember, this season there are no rules! So Gabby & Rachel go over to the mansion and have all 29 (!!!) guys change into speedos, telling them that there will be a pageant- complete with interview and talent. It seems that NO ONE’S speedo fits because I’ve never seen so many black censor bars in my whole Earthly life!!! There are so many ding a lings trying to make a break for it everywhere you look!!! Some guys juggle, Chris sings (terribly), one guy does the worm (you KNOW that hurt), and Meatball pours marinara down his mostly naked and hairy body. I won’t eat spaghetti for a lonnnnng time! Jesse Palmer announces that the winners (6 of them) get to go to an exclusive after party at G&R’s mansion.

At the after party, Rachel is having a hard time. You can just see her spacing out as guy after guy offers up inane conversation topics like “how many US states he’s been to” and “which Harry Potter house she’d be in”. Meanwhile, Gabby seems to be having a pretty good time. Then Logan kisses BOTH girls, one after another. When G&R get together to compare notes Rachel says Logan kissed her and she likes him so Gabby keeps her Logan kiss to herself and lets R pursue him.

Rachel gives Logan her rose and Gabby gives hers to Johnny.

Jordan V’s 1-1

Rachel takes fresh faced Jordan V on a zero gravity plane. They float around and make out and no one vomits. Huzzah! I have so many questions about how a normal looking plane can get to zero gravity! But I’ll have to google that later because ABC ain’t sharing.

Fake Dinner

That night Rachel and Jordan are having Fake Dinner and Jordan is saying all the right things. They are getting along great but Rachel just isn’t feeling a spark. It could be because Jordan is cute and all but he looks about 17 years old. R talks to the producers and asks if she can send him home. They say sure. But wait! Do you have to ask G first? Again, there are no rules!!! It’s romantic mayhem up in here! So Rachel sends baby face Jordan home.

Back at the guy’s house, most of the guys are sitting around when a producer comes in and grabs Jordan’s bag. They then realize he’s been sent home and are SHOOK. Especially because it’s just the first 1-1!!! Meanwhile, Chris (the terrible singer) is chatting with a group of guys and brings up Fantasy Suites. What?!? It’s like day 4, dude. Way too soon!!! He says that when, not if, he gets to Fantasy Suites, if he finds out his girl has been intimate with another man, that’s a deal breaker and he’ll leave. But he won’t be sharing that info with G&R!!! Nice. Immediately the other guys jump to the ladies’ defense. Nate says Chris needs to have more respect, that G&R could be their loves and mothers of their children. V cool to see the guys having the ladies’ backs.

Nate’s 1-1

Nate and Gabby take a helicopter ride around LA. They make out and afterwards go in a hot tub. You have REALLY got to be a fan of hot tubs to be on this show. I notice they never have the bubbles going though, so are they really just tepid bath tubs?? Nate is wearing more jewelry than I do on any given day, including a pearl necklace, but I’m here for it. He’s giving me the villian from Black Panther meets Harry Styles vibes. That night they have fake dinner and Nate tells Gabby he has a 6 year old daughter. It’s v sweet listening to him talk about his baby girl. Gabby gives him the rose.

Pre-Rose Ceremony Cocktail Party

G&R are having a good night. The guys are attentive and everyone is kissing each other. Then, three of the guys grab Rachel and tell her about Chris’s Fantasy Suites talk. You can tell R has no idea who Chris is at first but then she gets angry. R pulls G away from her talk with some rando and fills G in on what’s going on with Chris. G&R then confront Chris who acts so bothered by these little women. He is so patronizing and condescending it’s not even funny. They send him home. He walks out then WALKS RIGHT BACK IN!!! He’s not respectful of the ladies’ decision AT ALL. Chris gathers up the guys he told about the Fantasy Suite business to confront them, but before he gets a chance, G&R spot him and kick him out. Again. What nerve he has!

Rose Ceremony

It’s announced that these roses are coming from both women. The ceremony itself is non-eventful. Going home: Ryan, Brandan (yes he spells it that way, UGH), Colin, Matt, Justin, and John. None of whom I could pick out of a lineup!!!

And that’s it for this week! Next week looks promising! I just hope at some point G&R sit down and hash out some rules before they get too far into this thing or it’s gonna get messy!!!
Until next week BBs! xo ๐ŸŒน

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The Bachelorettes

Season Premier BBs! I’m back with my thoughts on the first week of the first season with two, count em, two bachelorettes- Gabby and Rachel!!! Let’s dive right in!

Firstly, what is this new mansion the girls are staying in?? Secondly, they both look amazing in their first night dresses! Thirdly, even Jesse Palmer has no idea how this is going to work! Did NO ONE sit down and spitball some ideas?? There are no rules here and sometimes you need a bit of structure!

Limo entrances-

I’m not going to list all the men. I think there are 417 of them. But I will note my standouts.

Zach is the first one out and both ladies agree he’s a cutie.
Matt is cute.
Logan, 26 brings two live baby chicks! They are pooping in his hands- bahahaha!!!
Quince tells G&R “I haven’t had sex in a year and a half!” Okayyyy.
Guys keep bring up Clayton. LET IT GO.
Alec brings a 4 person high school choral group to sing his praises!
One guy shows up barefoot. Gross.
One guy is called Meatball and brings a ginormous meatball sub.
Tino drives in on a forklift.
Jacob rides in shirtless and oiled on a horse. The horse is more beautiful than he is TBH.
There’s a set of twins who look to be about 9 years old.
Then there’s Erich (WHY did his parents add the H???).
And Aven. Dear LORT!!! This man is gorgeous!!!

Gabby gets the first kiss of the evening from Mario. Then Rachel gets a kiss from Tino, who turns out to be pretty cute. Erich ( it PAINS me to type that H) kisses Gabby. Good thing he’s a cutie.

Rachel gives her first impression rose to Tino and Gabby gives hers to Mario.

Rose Ceremony

All the men line up as per usual and R&G call Roby the magician (LAME) and the prepubescent twins Justin and Joey and ask to speak to them. The ladies take the men outside and send them home. I like this! Why make them sweat through an hours long rose ceremony if you’re not feeling it?? Brava!!!

The ladies walk back inside, tell the remaining guys what just went down and let them know that they are all safe from elimination and will be continuing on next week.

And that’s it for the premier! No rules! The previews for the season showcase the prerequisite teary montage, but also they go on a cruise!!! And to Paris, and it looks like Holland maybe. Way to go ABC for upping the budget finally after seasons staged in resorts because of Covid!

So, who stood out to you BBs??? Until next week!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Finale

It’s the finale BBs! While social media spoiled the ending for me, I still had to watch! AND Hulu didn’t have the finale for some reason so I had to sit through commercials and lost 3 hours of my life!!! So settle in folks!


It’s almost time for Michelle to pick her man, but first Nayte and Brandon have to meet her parents. Brandon’s already met them if you remember, in Minnesota. This time around he pours on the charm and they fall in love with him right before my eyes. I mean, they are ready to adopt the man!


Nayte’s meeting doesn’t go as well. In fact, it’s a dumpster fire. Dad’s hatred of Nayte is only outmatched by Mom’s. In fact, Mom tells Michelle Nayte is not open with his feelings OR ready for an engagement. Geesh LaVonne, tell us how you really feel! Michelle says she has to rethink her relationship with Nayte.


Next up are the last dates. Brandon and Michelle go on jet skis and then hang out on the beach. Later Michelle goes to Brandon’s suite. Brandon is non-stop with his gushing about how much he loves Michelle. Finally she squeaks out an I love you too, but there’s no heat. Brandon is super sweet and I don’t doubt he would kill for Michelle without a moment’s hesitation, but there’s no spark, no chemistry between them.


Nayte’s last date with Michelle involves a shaman. N & M are supposed to burn sage and say their wishes for each other but Nayte can’t seem to string together a coherent sentence. Michelle is less than impressed. That night in Nayte’s suite they talk and Nayte opens up and Michelle says all her doubts and fears are resolved. When Michelle gets back to her room there’s a sweet letter from Brandon waiting for her. I don’t think it’s going to be enough to save him though. Plus, IMO Brandon’s pants are always way too short!


Sure enough, Brandon is the first man to meet up with Michelle on the beach. And we all know what that means. ABC still makes the poor guy recite his I love you so much speech before they’ll let Michelle break up with him. She’s still saying I love you though! Poor Brandon is BROKEN UP. He’s crying, she’s crying. It’s v v sad. Man’s gonna need a good therapist. He’s a total gentleman about the whole thing though.


Nayte comes out and is looking so v cute in his suit. He proposes, the ring is gorgeous, she says yes then calls him her SoulNayte and I die a little inside.


After The Final Rose


Brandon comes out and we’re forced to watch his heartbreak all over again with him. It’s pitiful! Then Michelle comes out and their outfits match! Bless.


Nayte comes out and joins Michelle. They show M & N’s moms in the audience and they are BFFs now. So cute! Then ABC gives Michelle and Nayte $200k toward their first house! OMG! ABC has mad faith that this will work out!!!


Later, Clayton comes out and they make him read hate tweets about himself. Bless again! It’s funny though. They show a sneak peek of his season but it’s basically the whole season! They’ve left NOTHING to look forward to! But you know I’ll be watching.


See y’all in 2 weeks BBs!!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 9 Recap

It’s Fantasy Suite time BBs!!! For this momentous occasion, ABC flies everyone to Mexico! I find this interesting because why couldn’t they fly to their respective hometowns but Mexico is ok? Hmmmm. Curious.


First up is Brandon. Brandon and Michelle go horseback riding in the jungle then on the beach. I can’t take Brandon seriously. He professes his love for Michelle every 30 seconds. EVERYTHING they do is the MOST ROMANTIC thing he’s ever done. It’s just all so over the top. Case in point, the man literally says “I canโ€™t wait to literally rip my heart out, throw it on the table, and just say, do what you want with it, because it only beats for you at this point.” I MEAN. So the next morning comes and they are fully clothed. Like, he’s in a HOODIE. It’s so G rated it’s almost funny!


Joe is next. Joe’s been agonizing over these Fantasy Suite dates. They go zip lining and Joe screams Michelle’s name over and over! Save it for tonight Joe!!! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Later, Michelle commends Joe on being vulnerable and open and I’m just not seeing that. You can barely hear the man speak! They spend the night together (I mean, what man is turning down the Fantasy Suite?) and that’s about it. Joe is super cute but BORING.


Finally, Nayte is up. Nayte’s been the most relaxed about these dates, saying he focuses on his own connection, which is a smart idea…but he also is just now realizing 2 other guys are in serious relationships with his girlfriend. Yikes. Nayte and Michelle go out on a catamaran on the ocean. Their physical chemistry is palpable. AND Michelle says she has never felt like she does when she kisses Nayte. Uh, Brandon and Joe? Might wanna pack your bags. Nayte and Michelle spend the night together only after Michelle leads Nayte into telling her he loves her over Fake DInner. Mind you he JUST last week told his stepdad who raised him that he loves him FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! The next morning they look like something big went down last night. Michelle says she’s in love with Nayte but I don’t think he’s ready for an engagement, despite what he says. He is still talking about how he’s never been in love until now. Not that you can’t marry your first love but when you’ve only spent a total of 72 hours with someone, it may not work out in the end.


The Rose Ceremony


Nayte gets the first rose, natch. But before that can happen, Brandon pulls Michelle aside to gush about how much he loves her and he’ll be here for her even if she sends him home. Again, it’s just too much!!! BTW, Michelle looks amazing in a sparkly dress that’s giving me mermaid vibes. Brandon gets the last rose. And here is where I predict Michelle is going to pick Nayte at the end. She hasn’t told Brandon she’s in love with him, just Nayte. With Brandon she throws around words like “best friend”. Anyway, Joe goes home crying in the car and I feel badly for him. But he’ll do alright back in Minneapolis I’m sure!!!


Until next week’s 3 hour (LORD HELP ME) finale BBs!!! xo๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Men Tell All

Men Tell All! The Men Tell Alls have been lame the last few seasons so the bar is low ABC. Do your worst! ๐Ÿ˜‚


The show starts out reliving Will (WHO?) and Peter’s (pizza boy) feud. The animosity is high. Then Peter “serves” Will with a defamation of character suit. But it’s so obviously a producer skit. Then they revisit Ryan and his notes from the first night.


It comes out that apparently Martin had a girlfriend while on the show, which is remarkable to me because of his hair and jewelry choices. Also his teeth look like they are fighting for space in his mouth. But I suppose every pot has a lid! They talked to Chris about his speaking for Michelle and all he had to say was that “Maybe I came on a little strong”. Okaaaaay.


Jamie then comes out and is still so sleazy and STILL can’t give a straight answer! Then Rick is up and they bring out the creepiest looking cake that’s supposed to be Rick’s head. Shudder! Rodney is up next and a plant in the audience “streaks” through the crowd yelling “We love you Rodney!”.


Michelle comes out next. All the guys basically line up to apologize to her. Even Jamie gives a pitiful non apology “IF anyone’s feelings were hurt then I’m sorry.” Michelle stays so poised and puts all the jerks on blast.


The bloopers are pretty funny!


Sneak peek of Clayton’s Bachelor season is shown at the end of the show and I’m super annoyed. They literally spoil the whole show! Way to go ABC!!! They show Clayton say he’s falling in love with 2 women and IS in love with one and they’re talking about the final 3! Come on! AND Clayton admits to being intimate with 2 of them. Oy. WHY watch now???


That’s it until next week BBs!!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 7

Hometowns BBs!!! One of my favorite episodes! I love taking a peek at the families who raised these guys! Of course we aren’t actually going to any home towns because of Covid. Just some rando living room. Whomp whomp.


Brandon


For their day date Brandon takes Michelle to a … skate park. WHUT??? Are they 12?? So confused! And there’s a pink box that keeps appearing in shots but they never open the box. WHAT is in the box???


That night they go to meet Brandon’s mom, dad (or stepdad?), and brother Noah. The brother DELAYED GOING INTO THE NAVY to come on the Bachelorette!!! Also, Noah has some serious style. Are those glasses prescription? Hmmm. Noah gives Michelle the 3rd degree, rapid firing questions. The whole family is cute as can be and I adore them.


My problem with Brandon is that I think he’s romanticized this whole thing to the Nth degree and he’s in love with the idea of it all, not Michelle herself. I mean, he’s professing his love for her and they’ve spent 15 minutes together!


Rodney


I’ve always liked Rodney but he leveled up today. They go apple picking for their day date and he’s just so attentive and sweet and funny.


That night Michelle meets Rodney’s mom and dad/stepdad. They are also adorable. BUT I think Michelle has put Rodney in the friend zone to stay. When Mom of Rodney asks them about each other Rodney gushes about Michelle and Michelle just says “Yeah, it’s been fun.” Whomp whomp again!


Joe


Today’s date is at Joe’s high school. YAWN. We were JUST at Michelle’s high school! Joe throws Michelle a prom and it’s a mixture of sweet (he remembered she was picked last for prom) and sad (it is a prom for just the 2 of them). Michelle is over the moon about the prom and Joe and the whole thing.


Michelle meets Joe’s family and it’s clear where he gets his silent tendencies from. I mean, the man has spoken 4 words all season!!! His dad and brother are practically mute! The most talkative person in his family is his sister in law. She’s funny too. SIL says “I hope this works out because we’ll probably see her at the grocery store” since they live close to each other.


Nayte


Nayte and Michelle go paddle boarding for their day date and we get another look at Nayte’s many, many tattoos. I want to read them!


Michelle meets Nayte’s mom and stepdad. Michelle is the very FIRST woman Nayte has ever introduced to his parents!!! In fact he’s never even been in love. AND his family doesn’t talk about emotions AT ALL. I come from a family that’s pretty emo so this is strange to me. Also, during their talk tonight Nayte tells his stepdad he loves him for the very first time ever! It’s a LOT. All this tells me I don’t think Nayte is ready for a marriage. As cute and tall and funny as he is, he’s just not ready.


Rose Ceremony


Just as I thought, Rodney gets sent home. I hope he finds a good girl out there.

Men Tell All is next week BBs!!! Until then!!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 5

Welcome to Week 5 BBs! This week we are in Michelle’s hometown of Minneapolis, MN. and there are 11 guys left vying for her affection.


Joe’s 1-1


I find it a little odd that Joe gets the first 1-1 in Minneapolis since HE’S FROM THERE. I mean, wouldn’t she want to show someone new around? Anyway, they go to Target field where the Twins play and throw some pitches. Then Michelle tours Joe around her high school. They play a little pick up basketball.


Fake Dinner


During Fake Dinner, Joe explains how sports and being Mr Basketball shaped him, but also how the injuries affected him. He had to have some MAJOR reconstructive surgery on his foot (with a bunch of screws and a metal plate) and he never played the same way again. This really affected him mentally and he dealt with depression, anxiety, and (trigger warning) suicidal thoughts. By the end of their conversation they are both in tears. Poor guy. I really feel for him. He gets the rose and they end the date on a giant ferris wheel. V romantic!


Group Date


The group meets Michelle at US Bank Stadium where the Minnesota Vikings play. I know all this because CSP is from Winona, MN and a HUGE sports fan! The guys have to compete to be the Ultimate Viking. Dressed in Viking gear (not football gear- think faux {I HOPE} furs and leathers) the guys have to eat things like fermented herring, practice their war cries, and arm wrestle. Clayton wins the horned helmet prize and I think it’s just because he’s tall and a screamer.


After Party


ALL day Chris has been moping about because he thought his big show last week would have reaped him more rewards. In case you missed it, Chris stood IN FRONT of Michelle, addressed all of the guys, and dressed them down for not paying enough attention to Michelle. In his head Michelle was soooo thankful he did this. In reality, she was perturbed. Back to the group date, Chris is quite literally shocked that Michelle hasn’t pulled him aside to chat or come check on him since he’s been acting all butthurt all day. Um, hello! YOU are supposed to be pursuing HER. Delusional I tell you! Clayton gets the group date rose.


Sidebar on Clayton: At this point it’s already been announced that Clayton (who I don’t even find attractive in any way) is the next Bachelor. I HATE when they do this. It’s like now all of his time on the Bachelorette is a big fat waste of time!!! UGH.


Nayte 1-1


Michelle picks Nayte up in a pontoon boat in Lake Minnetonka. They boat around a bit then pick up 2 of Michelle’s best girl friends. There’s the chipper, talkative one who warns Nayte that they are v protective, and then there’s the one in all black who asks Nayte “Do you have any enemies?”. I LOVE HER. The friends grill Nayte and ultimately give their seal of approval.


Fake Dinner


All the while that Michelle and Nayte are talking at Fake Dinner, the cameras keep cutting back to Chris at the hotel who’s steaming over the fact that “Nayte took my one on one”. Chris is skulking around talking about how he MUST speak to Michelle right away. Sure enough Chris CRASHES NAYTE’S ONE ON ONE!!! Is Fake Dinner not sacred to you Chris??? Michelle agrees to speak with Chris and they walk outside to a bench to talk.


Chris :”Why didn’t you seek me out to talk after I spoke up for you”. Michelle: “No, you spoke FOR me when I can speak for myself.” YES!!! Had I been sitting there with psychopath Lord Farquaad my cheeks would have been all red and I’d be stumbling over my words with rage. But Michelle ever so politely puts Chris in his place and sends him home. Huzzah!!!


When she gets back to Nayte, she apologizes for the interruption and Nayte v maturely states he doesn’t need an explanation about her decision or relationship with Chris, that he’s just focused on their relationship. See why he’s one of my favorites??? Nate gets the rose.


Cocktail Party


Martin is speaking with Michelle. Is it just me or did his hair go from Ramen Noodle Yellow to silver/white since the last episode? Either way it’s still hideous. Anyway, they are talking and Martin says most women are high maintenance, especially women in Miami. This doesn’t go over well with Michelle, who, you know, is a WOMAN. She keeps asking him to explain how women, more than men, are high maintenance and he keeps talking around an answer, without actually giving one. ALL THIS coming from a guy with bleached hair and more jewelry on his body and head than she has!


Rose Ceremony


Miraculously, Martin makes it through to see another week. UGH. Going home: Casey and Leroy (who I don’t think had a single conversation with Michelle outside of the Rose Ceremonies!).

Until next week! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 4

Week 4 has come BBs!!! We start off with a 1-1 with Martin of all people. I don’t understand his appeal. The NSYNC era frosted hair, ALL the jewelry, the weird beard. But ok. He shows up for his date in a sleeveless plaid flannel shirt. WHY??? It’s an assault on my eyes!!! They go to the BMW driving school and learn how to drift while driving BMWs. Later they get in what looks to be a giant wash tub from Hee Haw and drink champagne and talk. This is when Martin starts defending Jamie and calling him a “hell of a guy”. Whoa. ๐Ÿšฉ๐Ÿšฉ๐Ÿšฉ Red flag alert!


Fake Dinner


Michelle brings up their disagreement over Jamie and Martin blames it all on poor communication skills he learned from his parents. WHAT?? Lame. For some reason Michelle gives him the rose anyway.


Group Date


This group date is sleepover themed. All the guys are given different types of jammies to wear and then they and Michelle hang out in this big room full of things like a popcorn machine and huge teddy bears. WHO thought this was a good idea for a date??? The guys are all ignoring Michelle. They are too busy playing with their teddy bears! At one point one guy even suggests “Does anyone want to play duck, duck, goose??” The Bella twins arrive and announce the guys have to battle it out by whacking each other with their teddy bears. There are 2 teams and the winning team will get to go to the after party with Michelle. Each time a head to head matchup is announced, the Bella girl ( I donโ€™t know which is which) keeps saying So and so VERSE So and so. Instead of versus. It’s driving me mad!


Kaitlyn and Tayshia can tell something is bothering Michelle so Kaitlyn takes Michelle outside and they chat. Michelle admits she’s not feeling seen since NONE of the guys made an attempt to talk to her during the sleepover. Time is of the essence so this really is surprising.


After Party


Michelle tells the guys that she is seeing a lack of effort on their parts and not feeling seen. Olu gets emotional at this because Michelle reminds him of his sisters. He gets the group date rose.


Rick 1-1


Rick and Michelle take a sky gondola (is that what they are called??) up a mountain. They spend the day portion of their date in a forest. They find a wish box filled with anonymous wishes and one mentions a deceased father. This reminds Rick of his own father who passed away 3 years ago.


Fake Dinner


Rick picks back up with the story of his parents splitting up. Rick saw a text from his dad’s mistress and told his mom about it. His parents then split up and Rick blames himself for their split and his dad’s subsequent depression and death. Poor guy. Rick tells Michelle he’s falling in love with her and she gives him the rose.


Cocktail Party


Michelle walks into the room and is about to address the group of guys when little Chris S stands up IN FRONT OF MICHELLE and turns to the group and chastises them for not making Michelle feel seen. He says there are men in the group who feel like they have it all “in the bag” and they should go home. WOW. It never ceases to amaze me how men can feel so self important. Michelle (and the guys) is clearly shocked by this speech. Michelle gives a toast, then Brandon asks to steal her away. Chris S then says he’s going to talk to her first, thank you very much. Again, WOW.


Sidebar: Olu’s beard is so sparkly!


During his talk with Michelle, Chris throws sweet Nayte under the bus and says Nayte thinks he has it in the bag. Of course Michelle tells Nayte so then Nayte pulls Chris aside to confront him. Chris says he didn’t mean to single Nayte out. WHAT??? Of course you did!!! Then Chris actually says “I came in on my white horse and saved her from the castle she was stuck in.” OMG. I just can’t even deal with this man right now.


Rose Ceremony


Chris S gets the last rose for some reason. Going home: Chris G, Romeo, and Will (who totally looks like a Backstreet Boy).


Until next week my BBs!!! xo๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 3

Well BBs, it’s week 3 and we are still dealing with week 2’s drama! But that comes later.


First we have a Top Gun: Maverick themed group date at an air museum. All the guys suit up in flight suits. There’s SO. Much. Jewelry!!! I don’t own as many necklaces as these 9 or 10 guys are sporting!!! It’s wild. At the date, Martin pulls Michelle aside and asks how she is feeling given the events of the prior night (when Jamie told her that the guys in the house were questioning her character). She thinks it’s sweet he thinks to check in on her. All the guys have to do push ups then get in a G Force simulator. Next they go head to head in a dog fight (up on a platform beating each other with padded sticks). Will wins the Maverick contest and gets a few minutes alone with Michelle, plus a bomber jacket.


That night at the after party Peter and Will are arguing again and it is SO VERY tiresome and lame. Peter actually says ” Bro you hate my mouth cause you wish you had it”. I mean, WHAT??? While Will is speaking with Michelle, Peter takes his jacket and throws it in the pool. Will is so upset by this that he cries. Tears. Then fishes his jacket out of the water. BUT to his credit, he doesn’t go crying to Michelle about it. Although someone needs to tell her that Peter is a douche. Martin gets the Group Date Rose.


Rodney 1-1


They play truth or dare. There’s a blindfolded taste test and Rodney has to streak naked through the hotel. You know, typical first date shenanigans.


Fake Dinner


Michelle and Rodney bond over his mom being his hero. Michelle tells a story about being called the N word and her ex not being supportive of her feelings. Rodney says Michelle could be the love of his life. Slow down there pardner! But I have to say, Rodney seems like one of the least problematic guys, and he is always smiling!


Group Date 2


Spoken word poetry. The guys are tasked with writing a personal poem to Michelle that they will then perform in front of Michelle and all the guys from the house. Jamie gets up and says he lost his little notebook and tells a story, not a poem, that’s a parable, not about himself. Ugh.


Michelle even performs a poem she wrote about being the token black girl.


That night…. Jamie keeps talking about how he’s miles ahead of all the other guys and they aren’t his competition. Says the group date rose is in the bag. Well, your bag’s empty Jamie because Brandon gets the group date rose! Ha!


After the date, Jamie pulls a producer aside and literally talks sh!t about Michelle! HELLO!!! You are being recorded!!! WHAT a dumbass.


The next night at the cocktail party….Jamie still hasn’t fessed up that it was he who told Michelle that guys were questioning her character. AND he speaks about himself in the 3rd person- grounds enough for me to send him home! Shannon doesn’t like that. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


Michelle is looking amazing in a sparkly silver dress. Her stylist is doing a much better job than in seasons past! During Michelle’s talk with Rick, he brings up the whole questioning the character thing and Michelle says well it was Jamie.


Rick immediately goes and tells some of the guys that it was Jamie. Nayte (one of my faves) says let’s bring Jamie into this conversation. The guys confront Jamie who is hemming and hawing and won’t answer a direct question.


Later, Michelle comes to address the group and notices a vibe. Jamie decides to speak up and tell her what’s going on. But he’s stumbling over his words and not making a bit of sense. Michelle takes him outside to talk. He STILL won’t own up to it. She sends him home. YAY!!!


Michelle is so poised and put together when she deals with drama! She then cancels the cocktail party and moves them into the rose ceremony. Going home: Pizza Peter, Spencer, LT (who???), and Mollique.


Until next week my BBs!!! xo ๐ŸŒน

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Bachelorette Week 2 Recap

Well BBs it’s week 2 and there’s already a pot stirrer in our midst! But we’ll get to that.


First up is a group date in a classroom much like Michelle’s 5th grade class she teaches. Three 5th graders join her and they are adorably tough on the guys. There are spelling questions, math, chemistry, and musical chairs. BTW, Peter plays musical chairs like he’s in the thunder dome and his life is on the line. RELAX dude! At one point during chemistry class Peter is whisper yelling Michelle’s name so much that little Mia says to him “Leave her alone, MY GOD” and I am living for it!!! Peter is going to great lengths to be the center of attention and the other guys are not having it. In fact, when they have to spell narcissist, Will writes down “Peter”. HA!!!


Night


OF COURSE Peter decides to confront Will about the narcissist thing and a shouting match ensues. Michelle hears the noise and pulls Peter aside later to ask him about it. He says it’s out of his character. Yeah, I don’t think so buddy.


Brandon gets the Group Date rose.


Jamie 1-1


They go to Joshua Tree to go rock climbing. It’s gorgeous there! They have a picnic at the top of the rock formation. Jamie seems nice but I don’t see this as a match, what with him jetting off all the time traveling and Michelle enjoying her life teaching in Minnesota.


Fake Dinner


Jamie shares that his mom battled mental issues all his life up until when he was 24 and she died by suicide. Wow. This is deep . Poor guy, I can’t even imagine. Michelle handles it perfectly though by saying “I don’t really know you, but I’m proud of you.” Jamie gets the rose.


Group Date


Basketball. This episode is flying by and I’m here for it. The blue team wins and gets time with Michelle at the after party. Joe gets the MVP prize which means he gets to go to the party too even though he was on the losing team.


Night


Joe and Michelle are vibing big time. There’s definite chemistry. He ends up getting the group date rose.
The next night is the cocktail party. Jamie starts talking to various guys about Joe since he hears Joe’s becoming somewhat of a front runner. Jamie is clearly insecure because he can’t stop talking about Joe. What a shame. He then decides to talk to Michelle about Joe.


Jamie tells Michelle that “the guys” were speculating that Joe and Michelle knew each other before the show and were boo’d up. This upsets Michelle and she calls the guys all together to address it. She explains that they messaged a couple times a few years ago and that’s it. Then she cancels the rest of the party. Yet another example of a pot stirrer causing drama and taking time from the other guys JAMIE !!!


The guys want to know who went to Michelle with this nonsense but Jamie won’t fess up.


Rose Ceremony


For some reason she keeps Peter but sends home Alec, Pardeep, Daniel, and PJ.


Until next week BBs!!! xo๐ŸŒน